Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
Octavia fidgeted backstage, ensuring her mane was in perfect form, her cello tuned, and that her bow wasn't frayed or missing any strings. Her equipment was perfect, and as she strode out onto the stage, cello in one hoof, bow in the other, she felt pleased that her performance would match her instrument's perfection as well.

Carefully, she set down the cello, resting it by the long spike that protruded from its bottom. She stood on her hind legs, a delicate and graceful synergy as she and her cello used each other for balance. Finally, she raised the bow to the strings, and began to play. The sweet melody of Beethoofen's Sixth filled the hall. It was a grand theatre that she often packed to the rafters, tonight being no exception. Octavia was extraordinarily professional, there were no tears of emotion as she played, not like other ponies she had met, a certain mint-green lyrist sprang to mind on that train of thought. No, she simply played the notes with her trademark poise and precision, and watched as the emotion unfolded on her audience instead.

She cradled the bow in her ankle, nipping it between her calf and hoof. At first her fame stemmed from simply being a musical earth pony, most instruments needing magic to operate, or were simply too awkward for hoof and tooth alone. However, Octavia managed, despite her lack of a horn. In fact, it had been said by more than one reviewer that no unicorn cellist could match her talent. Octavia allowed herself a slightly smug and haughty smile as she continued to play, watching as the effect on her audience ranged from a delicate patting of the eyes with a handkerchief, all the way up to unrestrained cascades of tears down puffy, crimson cheeks.

After several songs of a similarly powerful and emotive ability, she began to change tempo, speeding up into an uplifting and heartwarming little number she had written herself. The audience was lifted too, bright smiles and soft eyes greeted her as she stood, eyes closed, sawing the bow across the strings with unparalleled execution.

Finally, her set ended, and she released the audience from her thrall. Bowing low before carrying her bow and cello away, she left them to recover from the emotional ravaging she had brought upon them. Returning backstage, she rechecked her cello and replaced a string that had become frighteningly close to fraying under her fervent playing. The cello was then placed in its case with the utmost care, her bow resting beside it. She zipped up the case with the tip of her hoof, and raised the strap over one shoulder, balancing it on the tip of her hoof while she lifted it over her head, before letting it drop softly onto her shoulder. She steadied its swaying motions by resting the long, thin segment on her flank.

Now that she had completed her set and tidied away her instruments, she could relax. Octavia always enjoyed a light drink after a performance. Not anything uncouth like a pint of lager, oh no, she was no drunkard. Octavia's tastes were more refined, naturally. She preferred the smoky taste of a good whiskey, her absolute favourite being the oaky tones of the Jura whiskey. Distilled and brewed on an island just off the shore of Clydesdale, it carried flair and punch very few of the  more accessible liquors could match. No ice to bruise the flavour. No quite frankly, idiotic, garnishes such as limes or lemons to pollute its purity. Octavia enjoyed the taste on its own merits, and drank it straight, as she felt it deserved.

However, upon meeting the familiar blue-coated barmare, she realised that something was not quite right. The barmare was in the process of emptying out the till, and stowing away drinks in the cupboards. Octavia felt a slight pang of loss as she saw the Jura bottle get tucked away besides the travesty that was Buck Daniels. It was at this point she felt action must be taken, verbal and peaceful action, but action nonetheless!

"Excuse me, ma'am." Octavia put on her most airy and polite tone. "I was wondering if I can perhaps have a glass of your Jura whisky?"
"Sorry, love, can't do it."

The mare's rough, Braytish accent assaulted Octavia's eardrums, but she repressed the urge to clamp a hoof over each ear.

"Bar closes after eleven now, new management 'n' all that."

Octavia's grey cheeks turned white.

"But...but I wanted a drink, surely just one? It's only ten past eleven now, anyway. I'll be sure to drink it quickly in order to not hold you back!"

The barmare's eyes narrowed, and she stopped cleaning a glass in order to stare at Octavia suspiciously. Octavia, for her part, crept her lips up into a smile. A benign attempt to woo the mare over.

"You, uhh, you ain't an alcky, are ya?"

Octavia audibly gasped. "An alcoholic? What do you take me for? You see that poster there? I'm tonight's main attraction! The piece de resistance! I'm an artist, not a drunkard!"

"Uh-huh. But bar's closed, you'll have to go somewhere else, love. Try that club down the street, they're open 'til three AM normally."

"Very well. I shall!"

Octavia's eyes hardened.  She straightened her mane once more, shouldering her cello case and trotting off out the door.

"You just lost yourself a very respectable customer!"

The barmare snorted as the door closed behind Octavia. Her magic gripped a bottle from underneath the bar, and filled a glass about half a hoof full of a certain whisky she had been running low on.
Octavia is most certainly a talented pony, being more than capable of surpassing any other musician, unicorn or no. However, even a refined mare has her vice.

Chapter Two:
[link]
Add a Comment:
 
:iconbatosan:
batosan Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Recommended by- [link]
Reply
:iconrubberdduck:
rubberdduck Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2012
Let's see what we got over here....
Reply
:iconjuria316:
Juria316 Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2012
Hmm, just started reading this story, and so far, I'm liking what I read. :D
Reply
:iconmitsukiadored:
MitsukiAdored Featured By Owner May 16, 2012
Love how Octavia has very nice taste in her drinks ;) was listening to Octavia's Dream when reading this. Went really nice with the beginning ^_^!
Reply
:iconrandomdrawer56:
randomdrawer56 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
and it begins... :iconchallengeacceptedplz:
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2012
Reply
:iconrandomdrawer56:
randomdrawer56 Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:D
Reply
:iconthe-bird-watcher:
The-Bird-Watcher Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2012
I re-read this today after reading the final part. I'm gonna miss this story. I wish you the best in future endeavors.
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2012
I aim to do well! :D
Reply
:iconrahlyn:
Rahlyn Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This story was recommended to me since Vinyl is my favorite and I'm already impressed. Off to part 2!
Reply
:icondeathnotefan88:
deathnotefan88 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
ah, like me, I only drink if I have something to celebrate, and then it is only one drink

cannot wait to read more, great work
Reply
:iconcafante:
Cafante Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2012  Student General Artist
Sorry for getting around to this so late, I love it though! (I was expecting the chapters to be longer, but I'm glad they're not :)... guess that comes from reading so much Fallout: Equestria :XD:) Anyway i'm hooked! and i'm going to attempt to finish the chapters you have out before you finish the fic entirely (...im not sure if that'll happen but i'll try so i can completely immerse myself in what you have coming next :D)
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2012
It's an achievable target, yeah. I haven't had very much time for writing at all lately. :S
Reply
:iconcafante:
Cafante Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2012  Student General Artist
I suppose it is, but still its 32 chapters now!

And i can understand that you haven't had much time for writing, you know it being holiday season and all :)

Take your time to write, I am most certainly not rushing you, I certainly don't think anybody else is (at least I hope not)
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012
Holiday season has been very busy on all fronts of my life.

Not too many are, thankfully. I just tell them to wait if they try.
Reply
:iconcafante:
Cafante Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012  Student General Artist
I can imagine!

and that's good, plus you just got the new chapter out and all, so I can see you're still working dilligently :D
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012
Haha..."diligently." xD
Reply
:iconcafante:
Cafante Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2012  Student General Artist
lol... sorry :XD:
Reply
:icontelaros:
Telaros Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2011
umm did you update older chapters by chance? I'm seeing them as + now for some reason :P and out of order and showing up as "new" in my watch.
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2011
Anything marked by a "+" is a newly remastered chapter. I basically went through it with a fine-tooth comb and tweaked it, then pre-readers attacked it too.
Reply
:icon11monkeys:
11monkeys Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2011
Hmm, can see what you changed. Nice :)
Reply
:iconmre380:
MrE380 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2011  Student Filmographer
i am now confussed on Allegrezza Part one+ is this like the sequale?
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2011
Nope. Otherwise Allegrezza would have finished, and everyone would be all sad.
Reply
:iconmre380:
MrE380 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2011  Student Filmographer
so whats with the part one plus then? (and every good story needs a good ending lol)
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2011
I mentioned it in the Journal. Editing and updating the fic chapter by chapter.
Reply
:iconabaddon41:
Abaddon41 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2011
Just getting started rereading this Fic a second time, On chapter 4 of the rereread, even have myself a Bottle of Jura, so in short, love this Fic
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2011
Yay for Jura!

I can't stand hard liquor.
Reply
:iconfyre-medi:
Fyre-Medi Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2011
Heard good things and am going to start reading shortly. :)
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2011
Glad to hear it!
Reply
:iconrarityfan:
Rarityfan Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Critique number one: In the last word in paragraph one, you should make the word "this" much more clear. Elaborate on what you mean.
Critique number two: "she realeased her audience." I'm not completely clear on what they were released from. say something like: "she released her audience from _____"\
Last critique: When she is telling the barmare how she feels, it seems against character. Make her words a bit more elegant as if you're mimicking Rarity's speech patterns.
No grammatical errors on this story
Reply
:iconarclightkey:
ArcLightKey Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I second these critiques
Reply
:iconshawnay631:
Shawnay631 Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2011
I also agree with the bar scene, but be sure to try to keep the underlying need for the drink. The wording just needs to get mixed around a bit, but if you make it so she doesn't actually "need" it, it doesn't set up the premise of her going to the club at all.

Also, I feel you were a bit comma happy in the beginning paragraphs.

"Octavia was extraordinarily professional, there was no tears of emotion as she played, not like other ponies she had met, (a certain mint-green lyrist sprang to mind), no, she simply played the notes with her trademark poise and precision, and watched as the emotion unfolded on her audience's faces instead." This could probably be two sentences (the second starting with 'no'.) However, I ALWAYS overuse commas and am therefore critical of them most all the time.
Reply
:iconmre380:
MrE380 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2011  Student Filmographer
i am in love with Octiva and i am in love with your story...Bronys is where i make fun of MLP rip offs (cupcakes, Spiders, I want to make a Octiva charater so i was woundering if i can rip off your story here? [link]
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2011
Sure, go nuts.
Reply
:iconmre380:
MrE380 Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2011  Student Filmographer
lol thank you :)
Reply
:iconmre380:
MrE380 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011  Student Filmographer
faving all of these now so i can read them latter :D
Reply
:iconarcticfox501:
ArcticFox501 Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
my god this was so good
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011
Hopefully the rest keeps up the standard! :D
Reply
:iconarcticfox501:
ArcticFox501 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
i think it will
Reply
:iconwnaspp:
wnaspp Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2011
Read the WHOLE story again from the beginning :D
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2011
Damn, aren't you a trooper. :D
Reply
:iconcrystal-eclair:
Crystal-Eclair Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Braytish, haha yes thank you, you just solved my problem in thinking of an island name of my Pony OC's ancestors for my fic.
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2011
Much obliged. :D
Reply
:iconrysonn:
Rysonn Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2011  Student Writer
Hate to troll, but Octavia plays an instrument known as a double bass violin, not a cello. yes, there its a hughe difference. and im sure youve gotten this comment before, but just incase you havent, im posting it.

other than that it was very good! i liked how well you elaborated on her fine taste in alcohol. not fine in my opinion (scotch, all the way) but it does a lot to add to the specifications of Octavia's character. Well done!
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2011
Future chapters will solve your cello/bass problem.
Reply
:iconaskesalsa:
askesalsa Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011
So she was just being selfish, that darn barmare.

Finally got around to reading this. It's quite entertaining and very well written, making an envious brony of me XD

It's amazing how well somepony writes their stories. I've read famous works by famous author's that did not catch my attention half as well as this. I don't even think that making the characters ponies would get my attention as much as this. My compliments to the author.
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011
Why thank you, I am happily complimented. :D

This is a project mainly written for fun, so hopefully you'll find it fun to read too.
Reply
:iconaskesalsa:
askesalsa Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011
So far so good ^^
Reply
:iconcoffeegrunt:
CoffeeGrunt Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011
Excellent. :D
Reply
:iconsnowrav3n:
Snowrav3n Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2011
I want to compliment you, awesome writer CoffeeGrunt, on a story very well written! It's few of the tons of fanfics out there that have made me burst into honest laughter! Come to think of it, this may be the only one. But the constant quarreling between the characters Octavia, Vinyl and also Lyra, has made me LOL oh so many times! Though I have to say, what actually caught my attention about this story from the very beginning was the fact that Octavia prefers Jura Whiskey! I just LOVE the Jura Superstition! It's like drinking a glass of flaming tar! But in a very good way!

All my gratitude to you for delivering this great and funny story! I urge you to keep on writing it! ...I mean like really REALLY urge you to. I want the next chapter NOW! :D
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconcoffeegrunt: More from CoffeeGrunt


Featured in Collections

My Little Pony FanFics by Buckykatt42

fanfics by Wolfyrn

Fanfics by Arctic---Wolf


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
August 9, 2011
File Size
5.6 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
10,800
Favourites
180 (who?)
Comments
83

License

Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License.
×